Reassess the situation differently and don't keep silent about what you want. You need to assert yourself. Psychologically, you are at your best! Resuming some non-physical leisure activity would be a good choice.
Your sensitivity is very acute, but don't seem too difficult. That would be even worse.
Luck is on your side and upsets everyone around you. The people you fear will not threaten you.
Don't be so hard on your colleagues. There are some things you have to do yourself.
You need to get over your resentments... Grudges are not good feelings and it's time to get some perspective on what you feel objectively. Take stock of things!